Hi y'all. So I was dreading this week, straight up DREADING it. Wanna know why? Well my clinical schedule got pretty messed up this semester. All four of my Medical/Surgical clinical days got cancelled and I had to find four make-up days. I was in some frustrating email conversations with the clinical manager and he was being super difficult to communicate with and I was stressed. I don't get stressed to easily but there was two weeks left in the semester and I still had 3/4 days to complete. Long story short, I finally received news I could attend the Mental Health make up days to use for medsurg. But it meant doing three 12 hour shifts in a row. So to start off the glorious three days... thursday morning at 4:30 I wake up. yay. Did I mention my roommates were up and being super loud till 2:30 that night. Love that. Thursday was spent on the Dialysis unit at the University of Utah hospital. Super cool to learn more about the kidneys and dialysis in general, but pretty boring. It was the same thing all day long - stringing up machines, accessing catheters/fistulas, taking vitals every 15 minutes, and disconnecting the patient. After my 12 hours I did some homework waiting for Izzy to get off work. Luckily, she had to work that day so we carpooled and then hit up dinner after our long day.
Habit Burger for dinner. Izzy was also gracious enough to let me sleep on her couch. Huge blessing because she lives 12 minutes from the hospital so I kinda got to sleep in the next morning - and save money on gas. Friday morning I headed back to the psych hospital. My first day was with the elementary kiddos. Guys, I could never be a psych nurse - first reason being, I would cry way too much. Seriously it makes me cry just thinking about these kids and the other patients Ive met at this place. Most of these kids are about 7 or 8 years old and they were admitted for behavioral problems. It was pretty much a hardcore day of babysitting. But not just babysitting, super strict babysitting. Constantly redirecting the kids and enforcing rules and boundaries, reminding them of coping skills, rewarding them for good behavior and taking away points for bad behavior. Its sad because a few of them have behavior problems because they have a terrible home life. Their parents don't give them the love and attention they need, therefore, they act out. Yet they are angels on the unit because they feel loved. It makes ya just want to take them home and give them a good life ya know? So sad. These kids really were so sweet. Friday night I drove home from the U and immediately took my last unit exam. I full sent it and didnt do too hot. i ended up with an 81% after a little curve so Im not too mad, but I was so exhausted I just wanted to get it over with. Saturday - another day at Mental Health Institute. Last and final day was spent on the adult mood disorder unit. SAD!!( I cried lots today haha). I started off the morning following the psychiatrist. I was able to sit in on the individual times with each of the patients. The first patient of the morning - 21 year old female - was asked how her mood was. She responded "disappointed" the doc asks her to explain. She says "because I woke up this morning." The doctor immediately clarifies and says "Are you saying you wish you were dead?" And she agreed. I couldn't help but tear up. It broke my heart thinking about this young woman - my age! - who wishes she was dead. Another young woman - 22 - later on in the morning also expressed suicidal thoughts. She mentioned how she doesn't feel like her life has a purpose and she feels worthless. UGH. Ive never had a greater urge to give someone a hug than I did in that moment. I also just wanted to shove a book of mormon in her face and tell her how loved she is. But dang I just had to sit there in silence and hide my tears. See, I would not last long working here. I have no clue what its like to feel that way, but I do know that we do have a purpose, we are loved, we are never alone and Im grateful everyday to know this. It was an exhausting few days to say the least.
And to celebrate 36 hours of clinical completed - cafe rio! And watched some netflix with shawnee. Which brings us to Sunday - best day of the week. Had a super good fast and testimony meeting. And then went on a walk with shawnee - i love walks with shawnee. Welp I made it to finals week. My grades are sitting at A- at the moment so I'm pretty ok going into finals. Just super excited for a break and to hit the road down to st george.
last but not least - had to document cute sethy and his prom date. What a stud.
Have a good week!!
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